It's not easy...

Let go of me...
Loose your hold on me.

Stay away from me...
I can't stand to see you.
You make me smile and cry
at the same time!

Don't speak to me...
I painfully long to hear your voice again.

Memories!

Strange feelings...

I find myself wanting to get into the web of that loving heart
Why do I find myself loving him?
Why do I love him so?
Why do I look for something in return?

Because I know he has one of the biggest hearts?
The pure smile?
The strength in his laughter?
I feel the warmth in my heart...
but I don't know if he feels it too.

Stumbling across the past...

I don’t know why I’m writing this now but I don’t feel too good again. I just had a memory flash back. (Questions I had on Valentine's Day last year got answered! In the form of photographs). They say curiosity kills the cat! And it’s definitely killing me softly! Yes! It's definitely much more healthier to keep some questions unanswered than go around the entire world searching for the answers.

Just a photograph…
Just a memory of the past…
Just a thought.
And here I am with tears in my eyes!

Is it really better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? I now think this statement is totally false! I say… Better not to have loved!... and end up being so hurt, tearful and afraid of stumbling across the past?

Rain or tear drops...?

It rains and pours
Morning after morning
And night after night

The raindrops cover the tears
Cant tell the difference
Can you?
Tears or rain drops?

Memories keep knocking..
On the doors of happiness
And they keep falling…
Rain or tear drops?

Breaking up . . .

His eyes shifted round his thoughts
And all he could see was the clock
The clock that told him it was time...
Time to move on..
And break up with her!

He fumbled with thoughts in his mind
Not knowing which words to pick
Each seemed pretty much the same..

Laden with ice that sought to numb
Sharpened as a dagger to stab
Each with venom sought to sting.

No heart could survive any of the words
Again he fumbled
Each word came..
he carefully picked

Which had less ice?
Which was not as sharp?
Which would sting less?

He had to tell her
And only the words he had in his thoughts..
he could use

Carefully he told her...
The words numbed her
The words stabbed her
The words stung her

How could the same mant
he man whose words had warmed her
whose words had soothed her
whose words had sung to her
Have the same words?

The words that numbed her
The words that stabbed her
The words that stung her!

It hurt so bad
Her heart hurt so bad
Breaking up was never so easy..

If only there were better words to pick...

Still running....

It’s another Christmas…
And here I am working!

I’m told it’s the life
Of any average working female!

(Yeah right! Tell me about it!)

Anyway, I ain’t complaining!
It’s keeping me busy

My mind is at site!
A construction site!

Maybe it’s better for it there!
There’s a safety and health policy in place

I’m going to be quite safe!
Far away from the worries of life.
And love!

And Forgive Me . . .

You forgive me for liking you too much,
And I'll forgive you for not liking me enough.

You forgive me for missing you so,
And I'll forgive you for being so cold.

You forgive me for the loud racing of my heart,
And I'll forgive you for not hearing it.

You forgive me for playing your games,
And I'll forgive you for toying with my emotions.

You forgive me for finding you so attractive,
And I'll forgive you for not noticing.

You forgive me for raising you up so high,
And I'll forgive you for bringing me down so low.

You forgive me for wanting to be with you,
And I'll forgive you for avoiding me.

You forgive me for being so pathetic,
And I'll forgive you for taking advantage of it.

You forgive me for not being able to let go,
And I'll forgive you for never having latched on.

You forgive me for having hopes and dreams,
And I'll forgive you for crushing them . . .